Frustrations of a Mother

So, I was reminded by my neighbor that I have not blogged for an entire month and that I had better get on the ball.  My response to her was basically that I was taught "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."  So, therefore the lack of blogging.  However, she kindly said blog about what you are frustrated about and see what responses you get.

My frustrations lay singlehandedly in the hands of my 2 year old.  Her tantrums are bigger and stronger and longer than Emma's ever were.  One of my pet peeves in the classroom has always been whining.  I just cannot stand it and do not tolerate it.  Well, what I hate most of all has become one of my daughter's "best" qualities.  The instant she starts I want to tune her out and tell her so.  "When you can stop whining and use your words so I can understand you I will listen."  How many times does that sentence pass through my lips in a day?  I don't dare start to count.

Well, in the past few weeks I have done a lot of reading and talking with other Mom's and have been trying out a bunch of things with Rebecca.  (I love how I make her sound like a science experiment.)  I am definitely making ground but there are days where it is so difficult to hold it all together.  

I count on Brian to be my rock when he gets home from work, and he is SOOOOOO great with both the girls.  No one could ask for a better father for their kids.  He is so patient and gentle and loving all at the same time. 

It is very rare that both of us are at our wits end with Rebecca, but Memorial Day was one of them.  We were traveling home from a long weekend away and everyone was tired and out of routine.  All Brian and I wanted to do was get unpacked and ready for the start of a new week.  As we all know, the kids just wanted us to play with them and were pretty relentless about letting us know it.  So, we stopped what we were doing and went on a walk with them and played in the back yard together.  Well, bedtime that night was where the proverbial "Poop" hit the fan.  Rebecca was throwing one fit after another for absolutely no reason (in my mind, not hers) at all.  Brian had to physically sit on the bed with his hands under him and calm himself down and I tried with all my might to hold it together.  We got through it fine, but it was at this point that my mindset changed.  Clearly what I was doing wasn't working.

After the girls were quiet in bed, I took the computer and read some articles and reflected on all that I was doing.  The realization that I came to is that I have been given the blessing of these children.  God has given me the responsibility to raise these two people to the best of my ability.  It has nothing to do with me, but rather what is best for the kids.  So, the luggage doesn't get unpacked and the laundry doesn't get finished.  Rebecca has no one other than her parents to raise her in a way that will eventually make her a contributing member of society so we are not allowed to give up or give in to our convictions as parents.

Ever since that moment last Monday night, things have been looking up around here.  I seem to have gotten out of my little pity party and woken up to the responsibility that is at hand.  I will lovingly accept this challenge and be so grateful for the opportunity to be at home with my children even on the bad days.